GUYnECOLOGY

some friends and i are working on a men's health zine. i'm excited about it. i feel really strongly that many populations are underrepresented in holistic healthcare and that men are one of these.

feminists decided to take their bodies back from the capitalist, patriarchal system with publications such as our bodies, ourselves and women's bodies, women's wisdom which grew from some of the consciousness-raising groups of the 1960s and 70s, with susun weed's new-agey "wise woman tradition" of herbal medicine which grew from the back-to-the-land movement of the 1970s, and with the 1980's and 90's punk culture in zines like hot pantz.

many of my female friends have "taken charge of their fertility," know how to treat yeast and bladder infections, know how to bring on a missed period, and/or have had natural pregnancies and homebirths.

i don't know very many men who know the first thing about their health, seek herbal or holistic medicine, or go to a doctor for anything less than a broken bone. in a way i think this is a good thing. i don't trust healthcare providers. i am one. i still don't trust us. the first way to prevent illness is to avoid going to the doctor and/or the hospital. to a point.

but men get sick. there are illnesses, diseases, and afflictions that bother mostly or only male-bodied people. i don't really know what they are besides prostate troubles and i don't know if there are very many men in my community who know what they are either.

that's a problem. it's the problem we are trying to confront with this zine.

another problem is patriarchy. patriarchy is keeping men from healing themselves. it conditions men into thinking they are an island, powerful, virile, healthy. to admit having illness or the possibility of illness is to admit they are not all-powerful, invincible. preventing and treating illness are not manly things to do.

but patriarchy is also causing dis-ease. not only in the women who it physically oppresses, mentally, physically, and emotionally. but also in the men that patriarchy puts into the roles of oppressors.

patriarchy reenforces unhealthy psychological afflictions in men such as the cycle of abuse, addictions, co-dependence, withholding emotions, unnurturing father roles, emotional bankruptcy, jealousy, and rage. in my opinion, these psychological afflictions can bring about physical symptoms such as chronic infection, heart problems, asthma, and cancer.

in our zine we are trying not to create an apology for patriarchy, but rather offer a critique of and response to the cultural situation we find ourselves in.

utilising the templates our foremothers have created in the above-mentioned books and zines, we would like to create an anti-patriarchal men's health movement, supporting men on their paths to an egalitarian partnership society.

death midwifery

i just found this website

wow.

after i completed my OB rotation in nursing school i decided i didn't want to be a midwife anymore. the area of nursing that i felt most drawn to after that decision was hospice.

there doesn't seem to be much of a difference between the sacred spaces that birth and death create. not to me.




my grandfather died a most enviable death. he was in a free-standing hospice center on a mountain in west virginia. it was a very warm summer day, his room painted yellow with stripes of sunshine on the walls. quiet. warm. private. a man with a guitar was singing hymns softly with a gentle voice, unafraid. he was playing "just a closer walk with thee" in my grandfather's quiet room just as he passed quietly on.

i birthed my son on a quiet, rainy october evening just as the sun went down. a lamp was lit. the stove was hot with pots of boiling water hissing gently. he slipped out of me, the water gently rippling and splashing against the sides of the tub as he swam out of his warm nest into waiting arms. the rain made glittering sounds on the metal roof.




both birth and death are transitions that require everyone present to let go. trust. believe. be present.

stark separations of life's continuum create unneccesary divisions in the study and practice of healthcare. what's the difference in what a midwife and a "death midwife" does, really? yes. there are major differences, but do there need to be?

midwives ease the transition. they bless the transitioners. they help create and hold the necessary sacred space.

i think midwives can learn a lot from "death midwives."

i want to be both.

she can do it herself.

i want to tell midwives something that i just figured out.

it's so important, but so simple that it must get forgotten all the time.

you can't take your self to a birth.

there are lots of things you can take with you: fetoscope, cord clamp, ambu bag, respect, trust, knowledge, homeopathics, pitocin, etc.

leave your self at home.

don't speak unless spoken to, but don't touch without asking. between contractions. from a safe distance. and always be prepared for a "no."

don't bring your exhaustion, your frustration, your excitement, your loneliness, your sexual satisfaction, your fight with your girlfriend, or your worry about Dad. this baggage can only do harm.

this is sacred space. it is cleansing space, so use that to your advantage. take deep cleansing breaths upon entering and leave your self at the doorstep.

this event is NOT ABOUT YOU. not even remotely. don't think at any point that it can't be done without you. it can. you are an invited guest. you are not even a participant unless asked to be.

birth works without you. it just does. respect that. if a woman truly trusts you, she will ask for what she needs. or not if she doesn't need anything at all. which she might not.

when you respect this place, there are less complications; physical and emotional. when you respect a woman this much, she may intuit what she needs. you will watch a woman transform in front of your eyes into pure inhibition, freedom, love, strength, perseverence, infinity.

she will love you for it and you will have really become "with woman."

not "for-woman," "help-woman," "best-woman," or "can't-do-it-without-this-woman."

you will have become the medicine woman, the shaman, and the high priestess. the true roles of midwife.